So what do you do, if you’re not a member of the youth movement, and haven’t been for, oh, a decade or so? Maybe longer? Do you have those moments when you see some kids holding hands or smooching, and feel that little pang of regret because you’re out of the loop?

This is not medical advice. You probably won’t find this in many of the psychiatry text books. Medicine, being a science, relies on mathematical probability and provable theory. Time has definite biological properties, and its affect on a person can be analyzed and prognosticated by very specific scientific criteria.

Pooh. A biological clock is nothing more than a realization that we are finite physical beings. So be it. That doesn’t mean that the indefinable and much debated person inside the physical body is necessarily a slave to the march of time.

You are only as old as you act, as you think, as you dream. If you still have the urge to go ask that nice-looking person at the table over there to go out, are you breaking any laws, other than “biological laws”? Will that person run away, screaming at the top of their lungs, that some old letch is attempting to molest them? Not likely, as long as you do it with respect and civility.

The heart is a persistent motivator. It really doesn’t care what the calendar says. If it feels like having some fun and excitement, it will make these wishes known very clearly. Best non-medical advice? Listen to your heart.

If you’re really getting serious about this other person, and you think that it could lead to something a little more on the permanent side, here’s an idea you might want to try. Get personal. That doesn’t mean get into the other person’s business (unless they offer that). It means be personal. Share yourself.

For instance, would you rather go to Sea World than Saw XXIII? Say so. Make it known what you like to do. This is an outward expression of who’s really lurking inside. So what’s the risk?

Well, this other person may not be interested. They may disagree with your choices. They may not share your passion for bass fishing. So be it. At least they know who you are. And if they disagree, ask them what they would rather do. Make it a genuine discussion.

Next thing you know, you’re finding out all sorts of things about this person that you never even knew. What a person likes reflects what they are like, and this can lead down the road to discovering what makes them tick.

At day’s end, you may find that you are closer than ever. And all because you wanted to go to the park instead of go parking.

So what’s the connection? Well, have you tried to be creative when it comes to inviting someone to join you in one activity or another? Good luck. What hasn’t been done? Which activity or sport or dating ritual or hobby or musical genre or clothing style hasn’t already been done, captured on an iPhone, and posted on YouTube or Facebook?

So, what’s a Don Juan or a Cleopatra to do? Streak a 3 Doors Down concert? Get arrested just to get some airtime? Don’t be ridiculous.

There’s a whole world of ideas out there. What matters most is that any idea meant to attract some wanted attention from prospective partners in the dating game has to be unique, if not in content then in presentation. A rose is still a rose, but if it’s attached to an invitation to dinner or a pair of tickets to the latest movie premiere, it will get some attention. The right kind.

You don’t have to re-invent the wheel to go out with someone. Just set the wheels of your imagination in motion. Put a new shine on an old pair of shoes. And you’ll be dancing the night away.

No worries. Well, maybe a few. But the good news is that this is a natural point in all relationships when those initial passions have had a chance to burn nice and hot, and the flames have reached as high as they can. So what’s this feeling of uncertainty about?

It’s about being a human. Most of us need an close relationship with a person whom we can trust with our most intimate secrets. Someone who is more than just a friend. But there’s a certainty reluctance to totally give yourself to another person that is hard-wired into all of us.

And that’s as it should be. Each of us have to be self-reliant to survive in this world. There are some things that just cannot and should not be left to others to do. And it’s that feeling of self that raises its persistent voice at the sixth month and says, “Wait a minute – don’t forget who you are”.

That’s a good thing. Don’t ever lose it. No one should ever totally lose themselves in a relationship, because it will doom any chance of success. A really good relationship is a union of two distinct individuals who are able to share their commonalities in a spirit of mutual love, understanding, and support.

So don’t panic. Recognize it for what it is. Talk about it. And then play on.

So why would you want to add more fuel to the fire by pretending to be something you’re not? What will that get you? First base? A second date? Doubtful.

Let’s face it. People are getting wiser every day. It’s because we’ve all seen just about everything there is to see, thanks to online profiles and YouTube. So nobody’s going to be fooled if you show up wearing a Jay-Z shirt and claiming to be in his posse.

Here’s a novel approach – try being yourself. Wow. Why didn’t I think of that? Who’s going to care if you don’t have the latest app’s downloaded on your iPhone when your big smile and natural spark are getting noticed. Sure, some people are impressed by bling, but in the long run, most people would rather be with somebody who is real than somebody who is really pretentious.

You can still go to the latest event, or hang out at the cool club. But it will be you, not some facsimile ripped from Justin Timberlake or Miley Cyrus. It will be you that your date will remember, not the GPS gizmo in your ride.

Just show up, wearing whatever you’re wearing, and let the real you shine through. It’s amazing how that works.

And then, that phone conversation. Or, even worse, the email (double ouch). Or The Worst – a text message (triple oy vey with a side of verklempt). It’s over. No good reason. Just a general sense of “this isn’t working out”. What? It took a year to figure that out? Thanks for letting me know!

It happens. To everyone, eventually. It’s unrealistic to expect otherwise. So what now?

First off, don’t take it too personal. It takes two to tango, as they say, and if one dancing partner decides they would rather do the fox trot, it just can’t be helped. Sure, it would be nice if all humans went through changes at the same time. But it rarely happens. If ever.

Next, give it some time. It’s called a period of mourning. It applies here. It is like a death, in a way. That iconic third person that was created – the union of two into one – has shuffled off this mortal coil. Honor that passing, and count yourself lucky that you had the experience. Many people never do.

Last, and most important – move on. It’s easy to drown in self-doubt, trying to figure out what went wrong and “what did I do”. Admit whatever mistakes you made, learn from the experience, and anticipate the arrival of a new day. It will come. Pick up the pieces, and get back in the game.

Well, hold onto to your hat. You can. Believe it or not. That “vision of loveliness” standing over there is – wait for it – a human being. Get it? A human being with all of the uncertainties and vulnerabilities that humans carry around inside their physical form, however unbelievably attractive it may be.

Does that help allay the insecurity you’re feeling at this moment? It should. The outward appearance does reflect the inner essence, to a point. But the rather unpredictable nature of heredity and DNA don’t represent the whole of that person’s character, any more than the outfit she’s wearing.

Do what comes natural. Would you like to meet that person? What do you normally do? Well, don’t you usually walk up to a person you want to meet, male or female, and introduce yourself? Spark up a conversation? Find out if there is, in fact, any common ground that can be harvested for mutual satisfaction, whatever form that may take?

OK, so maybe all you get is that three minutes. No sparks. No fireworks. So, you’ve just met a beautiful woman who, it turns out, is just another human being with whom you just shard a few moments of friendly conversation. Is that so bad?

And who knows? Maybe that “dream girl” might just like something about you. The “real” you. The one that saw through the superficial image and found a fellow traveler on life’s highway that they could relate to. Now that, my friend, is the “real deal”.